So I am new to being a submissive wife, as I have already stated….
In our house, I call my Dom “Daddy”. He is my protector, my lover, my head of the bedroom, my teacher, my leader, and legally my husband…
I had no confusion about my role, until I decided to start a profile on Fet Life. What I was looking for was friendships of other women like me, who I could ask questions of, read how others are doing things, to help educate myself, etc.
After signing up for Fet Life, I kind of feel like that scene in the movie “Mr.Mom” where he went to the grocery store to buy lunch meat and cheese. He asked for “cheese” and the clerk asked him what kind….
so she starts rambling off “cheddar, colby, monterey jack, swwiss, provolone.” All he thought of was “cheese.” So he stood there, overwhelmed, surprised, blank.
That’s how I felt after browsing Fet Life groups. I thought I was just “cheese.”
But Fet Life groups want to know if I am “a little, baby, baby girl, tween, diapered, etc……so I tried looking up “daddy” and kind of had the same luck…..my Dom isn’t like a lot of them.
I don’t have a diaper fetish….I don’t baby talk to daddy….I don’t play with toys all day….I don’t have a daddy who is 40 years older than I am…..I don’t treat him like a sugar daddy.
“Daddy” is my term of respect and endearment for him. I am equal to him in bill paying, making a lot of house decisions when he isn’t home, but do count on him to guide me through a lot of things, and he is in control in our bedroom, discipline, and house rules.
I just wanted to find some people like me…..guess that’s a hard thing to find?
I have wider eyes tonight, after seeing some of those groups, profiles, etc. I do not judge what other’s do…but being a vanilla for 41 1/2 years of my life, all I could do was stare blankly at the computer and mumble…..”wow, people do that? Oh shit, they do that too”?
Posts Tagged ‘wife submission
So I am new to being a submissive wife, as I have already stated….
Daddy has told me once he desires to try out sexual asphyxiation, which I was very glad to quickly change the subject…..the subject hasn’t been revisited….but he has started to put his hands on my neck, touching, caressing, and sometimes using a light grip.
I trust him to do anything, to hold my life in his hands even….but something about not being able to breathe, just freaks me out. I don’t know if I could let him try that out on me, deep down I hope the fantasy just goes away for him.
But if it doesn’t, then I guess I will face that, because I am after all, his submissive.
Some things I see online are hard for me to comprehend….like hanging, being tied up with ropes from head to toe, being gagged, tortured….and Daddy seems to not be turned on by those things as well, which makes me very very happy.
He also wants me to swallow. He has been patient with me, as this is something I really don’t like to do. I know I am not alone, there are a gazillion women who don’t like it either. Daddy loves spicy food, and his cum reflects his diet. He thinks putting a glass of water by the bed will solve the problem for me.
In all the relationships I have had, I was forced to swallow several times by 1 man. I was not in a submissive relationship with my first husband, but he grabbed the back of my hair and held me there while he just did it to me, without telling me it was going to happen. I felt used. I didn’t love him, so that made it so hard on me. I used to have nightmares. I even woke up several times to find him having sex with my sleeping body. He was a twisted man.
So back to swallowing……
Daddy says he can make me do it, in love or in punishment, and sure, he can, but I am usually relieved when he doesn’t think about it. He doesn’t know what happened to me back then, maybe I should tell him. Maybe I shouldn’t, and just deal with my thoughts by myself.
So I have been busy….too busy to blog about it even…lol
2 days ago I rocked his world..as he would say. Daddy came home at lunch, and lil lamb was wearing nothing but tennis shoes, folding clothes. He about fell over, his smile was so big.
Daddy gets very turned on by unusual things….this is one of them. It felt weird for me to be wearing nothing but shoes walking around the house, but he loved it.
He got on the bed with me, and began to put his hands on me, running them all up and down my body. Feels so good when daddy takes his lil lamb in his control.
He brought out the vibrator and pushed it deep inside me, watching me climax over and over again. I was so eager for him to be inside of me, I kept begging. He waited. I begged. He still waited. Finally he was ready to give it to me. I suggested he get out the vibrator, use that in me at the same time….(another one of his fantasies he had yet to try out on me) so his face lit up, that big grin plastered from ear to ear.
He was in my ass, filling me up, and had the vibrator deep in kitty. What an orgasm that was.
I felt bad though, he was now running late for work. Happy, but late. Sorry Daddy.
So right before 10 pm I got a text to bring out the handcuffs,blindfold, lil blue vibe, vibe, whippy tickle thingy, and lube. Should just keep the lube under the pillow. Its used more than cooking oil in our house.
So I laid out his boxers, got the items on the bed, and was waiting eagerly for him. When he finally walked in, I was pretty turned on. He handcuffed me, blindfolded me, and began to tickle and stimulate my whole body with the leather ends of the whip. He encircles my stomach on the sides, which makes me flinch because it tickles so bad. Over and over again he slowly drug it across my quivering body.
Daddy then plunged his fingers inside me, I was so relieved because I couldn’t take it anymore! Damn he knows how to tease me. He started to rub kitty on the outside….another favorite…..and then he did the ultimate….he used both lil blue vibe and vibe on me. Rubbing me on the outside slowly, while sliding the other in me, he got this rhythm going that I got swept away in…..and I orgasmed ….my body shook, it hit me so deep, both outside and inside at the same time. I have never had an orgasm like that before. Lil lamb lay there tender, quiet, quivering. Daddy kept kissing me, touching my face. We fell asleep.
A few days ago I posted about the kink items that came in the mail…
This is the follow up post….
So Daddy text me to tell me to have the mask, whip, vibrator, and lube out…and as commanded, I had showered, put his boxers on the counter, and brought out the requested toys.
I was nervous, I have to admit. Being the blindfold virgin..never using a whip before..it was settling in, as soon as I heard him come up the stairs.
He must have sensed the timidness, because after greeting me, daddy came to sit by me and reassure me that he wasn’t going to hurt me, I had some control over how far it went, and he would talk me through what he was going to do.
He told me it was time to put on the blindfold, and I did. My heart was racing. “Take a deep breath,” he whispered. I softly inhaled, and allowed my body to sink into the bed as I exhaled all of the tension, and nervousness, and fear. I wasn’t afraid of daddy, I was fearful of being out of control. This was a first for me. Even though he is in control in our bedroom, I can always see what is coming at me, what he’s going to do….this changed the whole thing for me. This brought the trust I have in him to a whole new dimension.
Daddy began to run his hands all over my body. Then I felt an unusual, erotic caressing from the leather whip. He made it dance around my body, moving quickly then slowly, all over me. It was such a turn on. He kissed my nipples then ran the leather over them, encircling me slowly. He ran it between my legs before he helped me out of my panties. Then he teased me with the leather, then his fingers, then the vibrator. I was reaching orgasm over and over again.
Daddy put himself inside of me. He was drippy, hard, and so turned on. I didn’t realize what this would do to him. I guess it excited him a lot. He came so hard, releasing all of himself inside of me. Felt so good.
He brought me to my knees and with the vibrator deep inside of me, I came again. My legs were so numb. I sunk into his arms, quivering, panting, coming down from my sexual high.
The lion conquered me, his little lamb. I always feel so powerless, small, loved, protected, cherished, when he is in control of me. He told me how aroused he was to see me wearing the blindfold. Helpless, powerless to him. I haven’t seen him turned on like that. He also likes the whippy tickle thingy, running it all over my body, watching me spasm.
Daddy told me I would need to wear my ben wa balls every day, to enhance my muscles, and he said I should do it at least for an hour. Wow…..homework. That’s a first…besides requesting I clean out my car.
The next night daddy brought out the blindfold again and rocked my world. He always moves in me, around me, on me, very slowly….teasing….watching me move my hips…and whimper for him to fuck me. The little lamb needed the lion so bad. He orgasmed me so hard, the lamb cried.
Last night I did something new…..
Daddy has been pretty tired…so he was having trouble getting his cock to cooperate and stay up. I asked if he would get the chair and move it to the foot of the bed. I slid down near the foot of the bed, and with the vibrators and lube by my side, I opened my legs wide. I began to slide my fingers in and out, first, slowly, rocking my hips, letting him watch me. I wore the blindfold so I couldn’t see him staring at me. It was hard enough doing this in front of him, the blindfold made it easier.
I interchanged between the clit vibe and the full vibrator, and even used both, and brought myself to a seizing orgasm. Daddy was so proud. He, of course, fucked me with his fingers after wards. We fell asleep exhausted, in love.
I love him. I love his caring, his protective, nurturing way. I love how he is now taking this role seriously, and is in charge. I need this. We need this. He loves this now.
This morning he slid his tongue in me, and made me come till I cried again. I just lay there. The little lamb was helpless, shaking, in love. He caressed my skin, and held me. He always moves the hair from my face, smiles at me, tells me I am beautiful, sexy, loved. He massages my body, and every time I look up from whatever I am doing, daddy is watching me. Smiling. He always looks at me like how a little kid looks at a Christmas present.
I screwed up today though. And the other day too. I am in charge of making his dinner, for work, and the other day I forgot the salad dressing. Its a big deal when you don’t have much food in the bag, and the salad is part of the main meal. Plus its the fancy lettuces, not romaine.
Well then today I took out the dirty silverware, as I have done so many times before, but I didn’t put in any new replacements.
My lion sent me a text….
I am to bring out the whip, the lube, the vibrator, the mask. I am to be naked. And for forgetting the dinner things, I am getting a spanking. This is new for us. He has tapped by butt, but hasn’t spanked me yet. I do deserve it. I did forget. I apologized, but 2 times now, isn’t fair to him. Its not like he’s in our kitchen and can grab what he needs. I sent a text explaining I understood, and that he knows whats best for me. I have asked to be accountable. Now its time to accept what comes with that. He is accepting this lifestyle I have asked for, then I have to also live up to my end. The lion has spoken. The lamb will be ready. I’m getting my first spanking.
I love him so much.
So at lunch time daddy came home to change clothes for his second job…I made his lunch, got his dinner bag ready, and tried to get my mind off the building pressure growing between my legs from the ben wa balls. The sexual desire was growing inside, and although I wanted him so bad, he was in work mode. We don’t fool around when he’s in work mode….there isn’t time, he’s really tired, he never initiates it, and he has to shower, eat, relax, all in 1 hour of time.
So I nonchalantly told him I had the ben wa balls in place, and gave him that sexy smile. He didn’t quite understand me, till we went upstairs and I explained I was wearing them. He was excited. I was laying on the bed, squeezing my kegels and easing them higher within my kitty to ease some of the pressure. Pretty soon my shorts were off, and then he started removing my panties. The excitement was growing within, I wanted him to fuck me so bad.
He started to play with kitty, looking for the ben wa cord, and slowly started to pull them out. The pressure inside her released, it felt so good.
He started to touch my thighs, then slowly brought his fingers between my legs, but careful not to touch kitty. He made circles with his fingers on my leg, then around my pelvis, close enough to kitty, and then back up again. It was killing me. I started to moan, my hips were moving, wanting him to just rip his clothes off and take me….. This is all I kept thinking. Just take me.
He finally lightly touched her, so soft, too soft at first. The teasing was immense. I was overstimulated by the damn balls and needed some heavy attention!
He kept looking at the clock, I knew he was going to have to leave, but he continued to touch me. Damn it felt good.
Then he said “Daddy has to get ready for work so I want you to touch yourself.” At first those words came at me like a brick. I am still getting used to doing that in front of him. I slowly inserted a finger, and of course he demanded two. Then he just kept talking dirty to me till I climaxed. My body quivered in the release, it was so much, especially since wearing those balls for several hours. I didn’t think it would cause that kind of reaction from within. Woa.
So he left for work….. with a hard on :)
He likes this. He likes talking dirty to me. He likes the kink drawer. He likes the power. He likes scolding me, texting me his desires. He comes hard. He makes me come hard. He likes being in charge… Some days though he tries to convince himself otherwise, but then the real daddy emerges.
So tonight my instructions are:
Bring out the eye mask
The black whippy tickler thingy
and our new anal toy
This is the first time I will ever have been blindfolded. I am a blindfold virgin……it turns me on, and makes me feel timid. I have trust in him, I know he wont hurt me…..just not being able to see what he’s doing heightens the anticipation. Its good for him though, as it heightens my wondering, it heightens his power.
Time to get ready!
After reading about Ben Wa Balls in the 50 Shades of Gray book, I was curious and decided to order a set. I was already ordering some items for the “drawer of kink” so I bought a pair of black ones, on a string. If you aren’t sure whether to get them with a string or not, do a google search on Ben Wa balls…aka Kegel Balls, and read the comments on women who can’t get their string-free ones out.
So they arrived yesterday. I had an emotionally draining day and decided not to try them…but did manage to show Daddy all of the new items in the drawer of kink. At first he kind of peered in there, and looked at me, and back at the drawer. I think he was kind of wondering what the hell happened to his wife…there is now a paddle, a tickle whippy leather thing, eye mask, the balls, a new anal stimulator, and fuzzy handcuffs.
He just smiled, but I could tell he’s kinda thinking I’m out of my mind. No, I am driven by V.A.G.I.N.A…aka “Kitty”.
I wanted some new things for him to utilize …..and I ordered them because I know he is still finding his way through this hesitation stage. I would love for him to proactively add items to the drawer of kink, but I think in time he will, once his confidence is built.
So this morning he left for work early, and daughter was still sleeping, so perfect time to try them out.
The balls are kinda big, and when you move them, they vibrate from the little balls that are inside the bigger ones.
I went and got the lube and the balls out of the drawer of kink. I proceeded to relax kitty by stimulating her clit, and then slid in ball 1 a little higher, and then ball 2 a little lower, just so I can feel it in the walls.
I am so glad no one is watching, because next I stood up and began to try them out. First I kind of walked around the room wiggling and moving around to see if I could feel any vibration. Not sure how much I should be feeling, if any. I am not feeling much from that. The package says though that I should have tons of orgasms….Hmm….not yet.
So the next step was to attempt to move them within kitty. S..Q..U..E..E..Z..E and yes, I can feel one of them. I have been doing stream-stopping for a long time, and daddy notices my internal squeezing skills, so this will hopefully enhance the strength even more.
Well the balls are interesting. I feel a fullness inside, and its confusing because usually fullness is during sex, or when toys are used…so kitty is mildly excited over these foreign things that aren’t doing much but causing pressure on her.
Ive had them in for about an hour….guess that’s enough for today. I am going to go pleasure her, remove them and wait for daddy to come home for lunch.
Several nights ago it was late…like 1:30 am late. Daddy had been home since 11 pm, but after his shower/eat/lay out clothes routine, he didn’t crawl onto the bed until almost midnight. Then he was in a talking mood. I don’t mind those conversations at lunch, but by the time he gets home at night, I just want our time. So finally I just kind of gave up and was ready to roll over and end the night, but he grabbed me and said he wasn’t done with me yet. I mentioned how late it was, but he quickly grabbed onto me, ran his hand in my thighs and said “You can’t deny me”. I melted. How sexy was that. Inside I was jumping for joy that he was being assertive, bossy, demanding. Woo hoo! He fingered me, slowly, then fast, drawing orgasms out of me when I thought I had none left. He does that. He won’t let me go until he thinks I’m done.
We then went 2 nights where he just dropped off the planet again. No assertiveness, no demands, nothing. It is hard for me to want to do anything for him, when he isn’t trying to actively do this for our relationship. I felt frustrated, pent up, angry inside. I could tell he was seeing a change between us, and didn’t like it.
The next day I started getting texts from daddy, asking in 3rd person if I had seen his submissive wife….that he needed to spend some time with her, and it was the perfect opening for me to talk. I let him know what this lifestyle means to me, DAILY being a submissive to an assertive, loving, confident, dominant husband. It wasn’t something I wanted him to just try out every few weeks, this is something I need him to step up and do, be, every day. That evening, before he left work, I got a text instructing me to be naked and ready for him. I wanted to oblige. Yet part of me was wondering when it would stop again…why get my hopes up, etc.
So he came home at 11 pm, I had set out his snack, bottle of water, and placed his boxers in the bathroom. I was on the bed, naked, and waiting as instructed. Inside though, I still felt distant, and withdrawn.
He came in, and didn’t even shower. He got right on the bed and began to run his hands all over my body. Caressing my breasts, rolling his fingers around my nipples, and then began to head south. It felt so good. He fingered me, played with my ass, I came several times, each orgasm was better than the last…and then the grand finale, he had me get up on my knees, so he could put his fingers deep inside me and work me from a new angle. My legs were weak, but I obliged. He just stared at me until I got into position and followed instructions. Then as he slid his fingers into me, he told me to touch myself as well. Uh, what? I had a hard enough time balancing myself, but ok. Oh my does daddy know how to work me. I came so hard I just kind of slid into a ball by his side. I started to cry. He held me so tight. I was crying for the release. I was crying for desiring this so much and wanting this lifestyle to work for us. Heck, I might as well have cried for world peace too, since the tears just kept coming.
I think he started to understand. By the next morning he saw my smile again. We talked some more about what my needs are. I don’t think he fully understood why I need this…and even, what I need from him in this. I wish he had conveyed that to me. But I can understand. I was speaking English……but it was sounding not so clear to his ears. I think if you are desiring to have a DD, HOH, BDSM, HOB, M/S, type of relationship, it needs to be clearly outlined to your partner. I thought I had given him enough information of what I wanted, etc, to get the ball rolling, but apparently not. So after the talk, I cried some more.
The next morning he took advantage of my body, and bossed me the whole time. I felt so loved, cherished, delicate, needed, protected.
I also did something for him….I made a list of all the dominant ideas/phrases I could think of…so he got an idea of what I am asking for.
It was like a lightbulb went off. He said he thought I was wanting the ultimate sex situation every night, and didn’t know how he could live up to that every day. So after he realized it could just be a night where hes telling me to masturbate, etc…and also, just him telling me what to do made me feel submissive, he started to get it.
I notice something about myself…when he is being dominant, I am so horny and pent up, through the rest of the day. It turns me on. I was alone all afternoon, and the pulsating, hot reaction from “kitty” was bothering me so badly I sent the following text to daddy… “I am asking permission to use the vibrator and take care of kitty until you get home, she’s driving me crazy.” Of course he immediately responded with permission, so I headed for the drawer of kink and brought out the regular vibe and the little vibe too. I slid the vibe inside and had the little one outside of me, running it all over kitty’s clit. Felt so good. I came so hard, it left me quivering, exhausted, relaxed. I texted him my progress….and received a text telling me he would like to see that in action later, and then we were going to bed. I was a little nervous about that….I don’t mind sliding my fingers inside of myself in front of him, but it is very intimidating to use a vibrator in front of him, for some reason. I loved the bossing though, very sexy.
So when he got home, I was prepared. The vibe’s were on the bed, and I was ready. After we cuddled for awhile, he asked to see me in action…..I kinda hesitated, but daddy proceeded to demand, and I followed through, bringing myself to a deep orgasm that shook from within. He was quite happy to witness that.
Daddy took me from behind, one of his favorite positions, and instead of coming in my ass, he released himself all over my back and rubbed it into my thighs and back. To me that’s gross. But he was happy.
I ordered a few new items for the drawer of kink…..kegel balls….anal stimulator…eye mask…. and even a paddle. Should be interesting!
I am in a different place than Daddy is. I am 42, and desiring sex, daily. My thoughts run through what I want him to do to me, thinking of being sexually submissive to him, and getting turned on from wondering if he will discipline me, or in bed, him putting his firm hands on me, looking into my eyes and directing me. I desire to be sexually submissive to him. Making this a lifestyle, just something that we do, every day.
At first, he seemed apprehensive to even try being dominant. Then after I kinda prodded, he began to try it a little. Then he started being a little more proactive, but it came and went. He would tell me to roll over, or do something to him, and then it would stop. I notice when he’s doing it, he likes it. He is more confident during the day, he is different with me…very sexual…very loving….very turned on and in tune to both our needs. It turns me on even more.
But then it stops.
I take it seriously. I take our marriage seriously. I take any requests he would have of me, seriously. I feel at times, he isn’t taking this seriously. Its a request I have made. He will say “Well, I don’t know what you would want me to do”…etc. If there is something I don’t understand, I look into it, figure it out, try it, give it my all. We would work through it together. Develop the rules together. Together. Instead of kinda rolling in the sand and just stepping back from it.
Our last day of sex was last Sunday. For him, this is perfectly fine. Then we got sick. So….it has been a full week of no contact. For him, this is fine, doable. Not for my body.
In our past, he was able to go for long periods of time without touching me, loving me. He would usually do something like go drinking with the guys, then if I would get upset, he would get mad at me (go figure) and withhold love and sex. I don’t ever want our relationship to go through that again, it wouldn’t survive.
He is 41 years old. He does work a lot….but he also doesn’t have the same sexual needs I do. He seems more in his 60’s at times….there are times his penis even decides to go flaccid right in the middle of being in me. It isn’t that frustrating because he will roll off of me and start using his hands. Love the hands, of course…so its no big deal.
My worry is though, when you are leaving everything of yourself in the care of another, you have to trust in them to know what both your needs are, and trust they will be fulfilled. So Monday night, I tried to have a short discussion so we could get to lovin’…which he made into a big rambling discussion, and by 2 am, he collapsed. Then Tuesday went the same way except he ended the discussion with “go to sleep now”. I felt like ripping off the covers and screaming “THATS WHAT YOUUUUUUU WOULD WANT TO DO, WHAT ABOUT ME…..AND NOW I WILL BE GONE UNTIL SUNDAY!!?”
So then he got sick, and passed it onto me. Ever since, we’ve been just trying to get better.
I am grateful for his love, his thoughtfulness, his being caring, sincere, honest, and caring for my every day needs. He brings me a water when he gets one, grabs me a drink when he buys one, we go do things, he is awesome. I love our day time relationship.
So at night, I want him to be in that proactive mode…like he is during the day. In regular DD, a man is always in charge. In our situation, I want him to rule the bedroom. So now he knows the parameters…he just doesn’t seem to want to, or understand, or the ADD takes over. He shows lots of enthusiasm for work, cars he likes, movies, etc. I want him to have the same passion and interest for this too.
If he isn’t in the mood for sex, why can’t he go to the Dr. and get a pill? Why can’t he order me to take care of it? I don’t want to keep directing, suggesting, prodding. That makes me feel in charge. But some days he won’t even start it unless I do.
I am frustrated. Sad. And now sexually frustrated. Lovely.
So the issue I wrote about this morning is still causing waves even tonight. Sometimes when someone is upset, they start trying to put words into your mouth, they start assuming that you mean “A”, when you are talking about “B”, and eventually, no one is hearing anything the other is saying. We are at that point.
I am trying to tell him the following:
“When you have a day off, or half a day off…I need you to help with the extra stuff we are trying to do to sell the house. This means removing paint off flooring, windows, etc. Touch up paint, pack, etc. We work from a list, together, as a family. No one is scheduling other activities during this time (besides the jeep maintenance..before you go there…). We are all doing it together. This is our priority, until it is done. If you have time to help with other stuff like laundry during the week, etc, it is very appreciated, I love that you are helpful. I love you, and appreciate you….we just need to start getting the other stuff done too.
Here is what he thinks I am saying……
I am not appreciative of the money you spend, or the fun things we go do. I am not happy when you do vacuum a floor, or wash some dishes or fold some clothes. I am unhappy that your car needs servicing, and you should reduce us to one car.
At this point, his texts are angry, frustrated. I cant text over and over again when he isn’t hearing or “reading” what I am trying to say.
He says he is exhausted from last night. He isn’t the only one who didn’t sleep. I hurt my back from sleeping on the couch. He isn’t the only one upset. I just want him to see that I am trying to sell the house. The house won’t sell if we don’t get it on the market.
I like spending time doing other things too, but this house list remains. It isn’t just going to go away on its own. He would be angry with me if he needed me to help with something, and I kept choosing to do something different. He would think I didn’t take him seriously, didn’t care about his needs, and was disrespectful.
I have done the laundry, the bathroom, and have tried today to get him to understand, without him blowing up and thinking all these other thoughts….we just need to work together.
He isn’t hearing me. He’s saying wild things like he should just quit his jobs and stay home, get rid of the car, etc. I’m at a loss.
Unleashing the kink….
Daddy read my blog yesterday, and came home with the face of “Well I know what you want” kind of face. He looked as though someone just handed him the map to the treasure box. I have been slowly throwing him a little bone here and there, mostly to get him used to being in our new roles, and to introduce him to the fantasies I have in my head.
Several days ago I threw out my back, so My protective lion helped me into the car, and took me to a client’s house. We started to talk about other people’s blogs, talking about TTWD, and then somehow, the discussion went to his interest in choking someone during sex. I kind of sat back in my seat, didn’t want to know more, changed the subject.
I have no desire to be choked. I know there is such a thing, I am sure lots of people do it. My luck though, his ADD would kick in while hes distracted, I would turn blue, die, and the coroner would find my lifeless body with cum all over me, and my husband sobbing in the corner. My parents would have to be notified of the cause of my death….I’m sure Daddy would go to jail, and my daughter would move in with her useless father. I would be in the newspaper. I hate photos of me alive, I am sure ones of me dead and naked with dried cum in my thighs would be just as attractive.
Unleashing the kink can be dangerous. Everyone has a deep, dark side to themselves, that we don’t reveal to others. Some people start to live part of their fantasies, and keep the other ones locked deep in their minds. I am asking him to live my fantasy of being in the Daddy/Submissive lifestyle….and I am sure he has fantasies too. Hopefully they don’t all include choking. In his younger years he was turned on with someone naked but wearing tennis shoes. With him in control, makes me raise my brow to whats coming.
Once you go there, you can’t take it back. If your partner is stimulated by the new kink, they will soon think of it as old, and wait for something new that you want to try. If you push way beyond your comfort zone, do you then regret it?
I am putting him in charge of my body, my life, our relationship in the bedroom. If the kink is fully released, I fear how far that will go. I am turned on by many things, and equally turned off by many things as well.
Daddy isn’t freaky. He doesn’t watch porn, he didn’t come to my house with whips, chains, collars, etc. He was satisfied with a few positions, when we began to have sex. It was me who brought this lifestyle to him…allowing him to read some stories I write, and now, blogs.
I would hope he would know me enough to walk gently in this new world of ours. So that we don’t get out of hand. That we don’t lose the love, the respect, we have for each other.
I don’t want it to go so far it is all we are attracted to. It would be fake, forced, not gentle, loving, spontaneous and a little fun.